Chill!
When I first met the Frenchman, it struck me how alike we were. Now that we have been together for six years, it occurs to me that, although I still think that we are alike, we are opposites in certain ways.
Example: our approach to lost objects. Recently, I misplaced my apricancello, which is this remote control device that opens the large gate outside our home. It used to hang on my keychain, then the little plastic round piece that allows you to put it on a keychain broke and the apricancello fell off my keychain, so I had to keep it in my pocket. And of course, once it was no longer permanently suspended on something, it got lost.
My solution to this problem: spend half an hour looking for the thing in our house (it can't be anywhere else), then pay the portineria (that's our doorman) 25 euro for a new one. And, of course, hope that one day, I will find the old one so that I will have an extra.
In fact, if it weren't for the economies involved, I would buy five or six apricancellos to begin with, so that I always had one around, even when one got lost. Sometimes I would know where all six were, sometimes one or two would get misplaced and then turn up. No biggie.
The Frenchman's approach: Search for half an hour. Curse in frustration. Search for another three hours that evening. Become extremely stressed and refuse to do anything else until the &%$(& apricancello has been found. Search for another three hours the following morning. Finally concede and ask the portineria for a new one. Search the house some more after that.
Total losses
Me: half an hour of time and 25 euro
The Frenchman, hours upon hours (would you believe that he is still looking?), 25 euro and a lot of stress, and don't forget about all those other things he never got to do (watching TV, reading the paper, hanging out with the Bambina) because he spent all that time looking for a gate opener.
I like to minimize hassle, stress and time lost. Once when I was in university, I knew that in the coming month I would have NO time to do things like laundry. So I went to the store and bought twenty five pairs of socks and underwear. My roommates thought that I was nuts, but with the socks and underwear that I already had, my bulk purchase allowed me to have clean socks and underwear everyday for a month without ever doing laundry. The Frenchman would have rejected this strategy. He would have stressed about the cost of socks and underwear (which is silly 'cause you can NEVER have too many socks and underwear), not bothered buying any new pairs, and ten days later, stressed out about having to find the time to do the laundry.
The reason for our different approaches? At first I thought it might be cultural, and then I realized that the reason was probably a lot more basic and boring than that: he is the oldest (and "responsible") child in his family and I, the youngest (and carefree).
Sigh. Now if I could just get the Frenchman see things the my way.
6 comments:
At first I was going to blame being a male but then I read the first born thing. I'm like the Frenchman: first born, male and would look like he did before buying the thing. Funny I am the first of four and my wife is the fourth of four. You might have something here.
I'm the youngest child and would have your same approach regarding the apricancello. However, I'm not sure I'd go out and buy 25 pairs of socks and underwear.
If the gate opener situation happens again in your situation I might be tempted to get another one off the porter and not say anything. Slightly devious but it would save a lot of stress.
Both boyfriend and I are oldest kids (he's the oldest of four, I'm the oldest of two). I'd take your approach and he'd be somewhere between you and the Frenchman - maybe 1.5 hours of searching before conceding defeat? I'd totally do the socks and undies thing - I love efficiency. When I lived in NY and had to take my washing to the laundromat, I owned a ridiculous number of clothes.
I think the two oldest kids matching works pretty well though. All of my boyfriends have been oldest kids except one, who was the youngest, and he was the boyfriend from hell (well, ok he wasn't just the youngest, he was also spoilt rotten by his Sicilian-American mum.)
Hmm. This post reminds me of my relationship with a certain someone.
When I was a grad student and living in my first apartment with a dishwasher, I went out and bought more tableware so that I'd be able to fill it up and run it. Saving time on doing dishes really helped with studying and research.
I'm not above buying 25 pairs of socks to keep from doing laundry, either.
Some problems just go away when you throw money at them. For me, not having to deal with them is worth the expense. Sadly, my Italian is as frugal as your Frenchman.
My husband, Italian, is a first -born...this sounds typical of him!
I would have definitely spent 30 mins and then called it a night! I may have even considered paying the boy to go buy it :)
my husband did the whole underwear socks thing when he was studying in toulouse. In fact it extended to jeans and t-shirts, so he only had to go to the laundramat once a month!
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