The 60-Hour Workweek (for our child, that is...)
She's only three and wouldn't you know it, I have done the thing that I loathe, the thing that New York City Alpha moms are notorious for, the thing that I rant about all the time when I hear the horror stories coming out of the United States: I have overscheduled my child.
She has preschool (école maternelle) every weekday morning from 8h30 to 12h30. She has stopped taking the afternoon nap, so the rest of her day is, I mean was, free. I figured that since many if not most parents in this country put their three-year olds in preschool for the whole day, five days a week, the Bambina had it pretty good. So I went ahead and signed her up for afternoon activities. Monday she has free. Tuesday she has theatre class at the Centro San Luigi dei Francesi. Wednesday she has dance class (in Italian). Thursday she had an English playgroup and Friday, Suzuki music class.
Did I mention that she has stopped taking the afternoon nap? The result: an exhausted child, ready to collapse at about 18h00, and a schedule that is falling apart. The English playgroup was the first to go. What on earth was I thinking? English is already her dominant language and all the other kids in the group were speaking Italian. What's the point?
I'm now considering dropping Suzuki music, too. I had always dreamed of putting the Bambina in Susuki music but, besides the fact that the class is at 16h30 on Friday afternoon and takes four metro stops and three bus stops to get to, it's an hour long, which is manifestly about 30 minutes too long for the Bambina. At 17h00, she has had enough Twinkle Twinkle Little Star to 20 different rhythms. Plus most of the other kids in the class are a year or two older than she and are far more capable of the finger coordination exercises. She seems a little too young for it all, notwithstanding the Suzuki instructor's insistance that three is the ideal age to start the rhythm classes so that they can begin to play an instrument when they are four.
At least she still loves the dance and theatre.
7 comments:
I 'm really sorry but i think you're right: it's too much. Show mercy and let your bambina sleep and play more. Since we can't play all day long, let the kids do that for us. Oh, can anyone remind me why did i grow old?
How about if we compromise...the Bambina plans for her parents...and see where that leads ...TV with Bambina in the morning, restaurant, chocolate and ice cream in the afternoon....
Well, I found your wonderful blog tonight, and you made me laugh when you said the "over scheduled" term, so I stayed to read on. Don't worry My girls are teens now and they lived in Hong Kong and Canada and now back in the States. I had them in every activity known to moms and it helped to make them very flexible and satisfied I think. I made them keenly aware of the need for mental health days when I felt that they were approaching burn out. I taught them to take time off and do nothing once in a while. I try to do the same. Blessings, Karen
Canada's massacre of seals!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_3LuEx3rJpM
Sounds like you are making eminently sensible decisions. Sometimes you have to do too much, to know what too much is.
Found your site while doing a search for the Suzuki School of Rome. My kids didn't start Suzuki until 4.5 and 7.5, and they have both done fine and love music, so I wouldn't fret about the early start.
I was searching for the Rome Suzuki school because we're arranging a visit by their harp players to our harp players here in Scotland. And we have good Suzuki friends in Canada. Small world!
LOL Caroline - I went back and forth with this too. One thing to note - kids with siblings have "activities" all day long; onlies don't.
So, when I don't schedule my DS for anything ..he's playing with ME all day long...which exhausts me!
My solution to overscheduling has been to not schedule him for anything except school, for now. But, I arrange playdates with other families...often with multiple kids several times a week. This seems to be the best of both worlds since I can, without guilt at wasting money, cancel a playdate if it seems just too much!
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